Week 2 Picks (This week's theme, It's only cheating if they catch you)

"I think this guy just stole my wallet!" Eric Mangini - Head Coach, NY Jets
(winners ATS in red)

Week One record - 11-4-1

Buffalo @ Pittsburgh (-9)
No huddle spread attack - check, lighting fast running back - check, QB fresh off a 4 td game - check, best DB and linebacker that should be stopping the aforementioned offensive players in new NFL cities as a result of free agency - check. Nate Clements and Takeo Spikes probably wouldn't make that much of a difference. The Steelers will win easily but the Bills will score some points in the 4th to make it look closer then it really was. Lee Evans will be thrilled Champ Bailey is back in Denver and that the Steeler corners can't stay with him. (I guess X-body was right about something for once). Big Ben will come back down to earth with a good not great game since they will not need the pass to take the Bills out.
Start: Willie Parker, Lee Evans, Marshawn Lynch / Sit: Buffalo DST

Cincinnati (-7) @ Cleveland
The worst QB in the league against an opportunistic defense playing catchup with a team possessing one of the top three offenses in the league. Yeah, this one will be over quicker than Ed Hochuli can dead lift a metric ton. Keep in mind the Bengals scored 30-plus in both meetings a year ago and have won five straight in the series.
Start: Carson, Chad, TJ, Cincy DST, The Soldier / Sit: Everyone else who thinks some drunken, shirtless fat factory worker with a bone around his neck barking at you is actually cheering for you

Indy (-7) @ Tenn
Indy has gone down in their last 3 road games against division opponents and last week Tenn demonstrated a style of play you can expect from them all year by carving up a very good run defense in Jacksonville in route to an upset victory. Tenn will play Vince ball which is ball control, run-centric play calling punctuated by opportunistic defense. None of this will help your fantasy squad but it does win games in the real world. Jeff Fisher is a genius. I bet he cheats. I also wonder if this former Colt's cb (Nick Harper) will fare better than Jason David did last week for the Colts. I think he will.
Start: Chris Brown, Marvin Harrison / Sit: Vince Young

Houston @ Carolina (-6.5)
Carolina will roll in this match up. Steve Smith will make someone miss on a quick hitch and take it to the house opening the flood gates. I generally like Schuab but he will look more like Joey Harrington than Joey Montana against tight corner coverage. Julius Peppers is the best defensive end in the league and he will wreak havoc like you would expect once the Panthers silence the Houston run game and make the Texans one dimensional.
Start: Steve Smith, Delomme / Sit: A. Johnson and M. Schuab

SF @ STL (-3)
Gore's mother just died this week so his head may not be in the game (assuming he plays as planned) but it probably will not matter. Assuming they are all in the building, Alex Smith, D-Jack, Click-Clack and Gore will shred the hapless Ram D. Nate Clements and my sleeper D of the year who stymied the Cardinal's great receivers will blanket the gimpy Torry Holt and frustrate Bulger into mediocre numbers. Steven Jackson will get a face mask full of Patrick Willis all afternoon as the rookie makes things rough for everyone's favorite former Beaver. Pace (who is out for the year) is not irreplaceable but he will be missed. (late breaking news) T. Hill the Ram's starting CB will also miss the game with a back injury further depleting an already weak St. Louis D.
Start: Gore, Vernon Davis, D - Jack / Sit: Holt, Bulger

GB @ NYG (-1)
The old gunslinger has a few bullets left in the gun. The same secondary that made life easy for Tony Romo last week will bend to the will of the man with the funny last name. Favre will feature Driver all over the field including the end zone and Jennings will take a short pass to the house assuming he is healthy. D. Ward will run 'cause that's all they got. Greenbay's under rated D will feast on the Hefty Lefty if he starts in place of an injured Eli. My hunch is he will and all the talk of Eli suiting up and playing is just gamesmanship by the Giants. If GB is going to contend for the division this is a game they have to win against a depleted NFC foe.
Start: Favre, Driver, D. Ward / Sit: Plaxico, Shockey

Atlanta @ Jacksonville (-10)
I freely admit I harbor a Ford Field sized grudge against Joey Harrington. He will go down and go down hard this week but not before the Jag's D can redeem themselves by taking at least one of his passes the other way for 6. You have to assume Jacksonville will commit themselves to re-establishing the run. Look for MJD to have his first of many good performances this year in a Jacksonville route.
Start: MJD, Fred Taylor, Jag's DST / Sit: all the dirty birds

NO (-4) @ TB
Everyone assumed the Saint's offense would pick up where they left off last year. This is the week where it happens. Galloway might try to do his best Reggie Wayne impersonation but with the Caddy in the shop, Sean Peyton's offense will carry the day.
Start: Colston, Brees, Galloway / Sit: Garcia, Buc's DST

MINN @ DET (-3)
Detroit is facing one of the stonger run Ds in the league. Good thing the Lions don't concern themselves with little things like running the football. Minny will double Roy "THE TOY" Williams all over the field and probably try to single cover 6'5" monster Calvin "Megatron" Johnson with 5'9" Antoine Winfield. Expect the Vikings to blitz the Lions heavily and pay a price for doing it as that is exactly what the Greatest Show on Turf Redux wants the defense to do. Also, with TJ out this week you might see a glimpse of the Lion's future starter at RB, Kevin Jones to prepare him to play significant snaps next week in his hometown, Philly or in two weeks against division arch-rival Chicago. He has reportedly looked great in practice all week. Adrian Peterson will continue his strong running with over 100 yards and 2 TDs but Tavaris Jackson will have a rough time of it playing catch-up all day long.
Start: Kitna, Calvin, Detroit DST (yeah I said it) / Sit: Tatum Bell, Tavaris Jackson

Dallas (-4) @ Miami
Tony Romo will continue his hot play against a depleted Miami secondary with 300/3. Miami doesn't have the talent at the skill positions to take advantage of the shoddy Dallas secondary that Eli and Plaxico torched for 3 TDs last week.
Start: Romo, TO, P. Crayton / Sit: Ronnie Brown

Seattle (-3) @ Arizona
The Cardinals will slow Alexander like they did Gore last week. Watch for Leinart to rebound with a big game to one of his two stud WRs off play action. Also, look for Edge to continue his strong running with over 100 yards.
Start: Edge, Leinart, Fitz / Sit: Hasselback, Seattle DST

NYJ @ Balt. (-10)
In the battle of backup QBs, the team with the best defense will win. Kellen will make it closer then you would expect and the Jet's D will be happy to play someone in an honest game picking Boller more than once.
Start: Balt. DST, Jericho, Todd Heap / Sit: Both QBs

Oakland (-10) @ Denver
Travis Henry and Lamont Jordan will both be featured running and catching the football as these two bitter division rivals play a closer game then people expect. Culpepper will buy time with his legs and keep drives alive with dump downs to Lamont and timely passing to Jerry Porter (or whoever the guy Champ is not covering is). T. Henry will be effective on the perimeter and between the tackles all day long.
Start: Lamont Jordan, T. Henry / Sit: Jay Cutler, Javon Walker

KC @ Chicago (-12)
This one has blood bath written all over it. A team that struggled to put 3 points up on Houston last week will turn the ball over and fall behind quickly. Look for Grossman, Benson and Berrian to be featured all day. They will feed Larry Johnson early but the score will dictate a shift to the passing game by the second quarter. Look for at least one Bear's DST score.
Start: All Bears / Sit: All Chiefs including Larry Johnson

SD @ NE (-3.5)
Everyone will be talking about Belichick and his cheating but the real story in this one will be revenge for last year's playoff loss. Brady and Co. can try to max protect like they did against the Jets but the SD pass rush will get to the QB just like he did in last's year's playoff match up. The Pats will miss their safety Rodney Harrison against the Charger's run game more then they expect. Watch LT go over 100 and score twice. The Charger D will shut down the Patriot run game and make them one-dimensional just like they did against the Bear's last week. Randy, Tom, you guys might want to shorten up those patterns this week. Also, Mr. Watson will be targeted short more as a result of the defensive pressure.
Start: LT, Gates, SD DST, Ben Watson / Sit: Maroney

Washington @ Philly (-7)
Philly will rebound on Monday night at home in a big way looking much better then they did on the road against the Packers last week. Mc-nasty will connect at least once with Curtis on the same long pass play which he just missed last week. Philly has been vulnerable on the ground in years past so look for Washington to try to establish the one-two RB punch early and often. Clinton Portis will take a bigger share of the carries in the offense this week and with one of the top Philly DBs (Lito Shepard) out, look for Santana Moss to get lose for one of his patented long TDs. Cooley's numbers will suffer until the team gets the RT spot squared away after losing John Jansen for the year to a dislocated ankle as he will be asked to expand his blocking role at the expense of his pass catching. The Skins will keep the game tight but eventually fall short.
Start: Curtis, Westbrook, Portis, Moss / Sit: Cooley

Sneaky Play of the week: Patrick Crayton @ MIA - filling in for Terry Glen, Partick Crayton will help Romo pick on the depleted Miami secondary

Busted stud of the week: Tom Brady vs. SD - Please don't hurt him Shawne, he's got a few new mouths to feed.