Thursday, November 8, 2007
Saturday, October 20, 2007
MJD dinged up - hilarious (Yahoo update)
Oct 19 Drew was limited in Thursday's practice with a thigh injury, according to the Florida Times-Union.
Recommendation: We expect Drew to play in the Jaguars' biggest game of the season, this Monday night against Indianapolis.
Anyone think this injury was self-inflicted? (watch his TD celebration after the long run)
MJD obviously doesn't have himself in fantasy - idiot.
Week 7 - The only picks you need to pay attention to
Tennessee over HOUSTON +1.5 - Let's flash back 2 months. Everyone was getting sick of the exhibition season and busy finishing the final touches on their respective cheat sheets. Someone please explain to me why the ignorant masses were so into Vinny Young. This scatter shoot armed QB will never be a great pure passer (like Brady) and his running will only land him on the injury report (like this week). Tennessee's D is surprisingly solid and most of the credit probably should go to Jeff Fischer. All that said, this is going to be a replay of the Tennessee vs. Atlanta game from 2 weeks ago. The punchless Texans and Andre Johnson-less Texans will struggle to run against the Titan's defensive front and fail to move the ball through the air with their cast of no-name receivers. Look for Bironas and Brown to engage in a field goal duel with a Tennessee defensive score as the difference.
Pittsburgh over DENVER +3.5 - Willie Parker and the Steelers come off their bye week fresh, prepped and ready to face the worst rushing D in the league. Denver is missing their center and #1 WR in Javon Walker. Pittsburgh will hold the ball all afternoon and take this one with ease.
DETROIT -3 over Tampa Bay - Mike Martz and 2 weeks to prepare SHOULD be a good thing for the Lions. Washington completely disarmed the high powered Lion's passing attack by dropping 7 into umbrella coverage, keeping everything in front of them and hitting the crap out of the Lion's receivers when they caught the ball. Tampa Bay doesn't have Washington's personnel and it is doubtful they would stray much from their traditional cover 2 look. Watch for Kevin Jones to play a prominent role as the starter (something I mentioned over a month ago) catching the ball short out of the backfield and running the Buc's older LB crew all over the field.
New England -16.5 over MIAMI - "Stick with the Pats until they lose." I agree with Xbody on this one (for this week). Next week vs. Washington is another story entirely.
NEW ORLEANS -9 over Atlanta - We always joke about how Fantasy makes you watch horrible games you would otherwise have no interest in. This is one of those except if you pinned your season hopes on either of these squads then you probably gave up on fantasy football and are currently mapping out your fantasy basketball draft strategy. NO demonstrated they still have a pulse last week beating Seattle at SEA and if they can put together a solid outing here then maybe things are turning around. I just traded Colston away in one of my money leagues so I won't be there to see it happen. My recent weekend in The Big Easy makes me root for these guys a little. As an aside, Bourbon street smells so much like vomit you wouldn't believe it. It makes your eyes water.
NEW YORK -9 over San Francisco - I find the Giant's defensive transformation from sieve to top flight fantasy defense to be amazing. I'm sure it has a lot to do with the emergence of a clock grabbing running game and the three-headed RB monster of Jacobs, Droughns and Ward. With either a gimpy Alex Smith or an old Trent Dilfer the Giants will be waiting at the line of scrimmage for Frank Gore, content to allow the Niner's anemic receiving corp. run themselves into coverage. If Eli can sting some turnover free games together this will start look like a team that could challenge Dallas in the NFC.
Baltimore -3 over BUFFALO - Ray might very well sit this one out but it will not matter one bit.
WASHINGTON -8.5 over Arizona - I grabbed Washington D in a few leagues anticipating a blood bath of sorts where the Cardinal's journey man QB throws multiple picks and the Cardinal offense gets bogged down trying to run against a stacked D front. That is what should happen but if both stud Cardinal receivers play maybe this guy pulls a Vinny and makes it close. I watched this Skin secondary dismantle the Lion's 2 weeks ago so they should be fine here. The tie break in this analytical deadlock is the fact the Hogs will be at home.
Kansas City +2.5 over OAKLAND - Larry SHOULD have some success running the ball but I think the Oakland D is willing to take their chances with Gozo and Bowe. Expect Larry's YPR average to be under 4 again as he is consistently greeted by 8 Raiders in the box. That said, neither Michael Huff nor Stuart Schweigart are Steve Atwater types so the Cheifs still probably roll anyway.
CINCINNATI -6.5 over NY Jets - Don't underestimate the impact of team dysfunction and bad offensive line play. The once consistent Rudi Johnson, he of 1300/12 TD seasons, has been awol with a bad hamstring as of late and Chad Johnson has been running his mouth in a bad way. This should be on of those over games for Vegas types as both teams refuse to play defense. Housh continues an quietly amazing season among the leaders at his position.
PHILLY over Chicago +5.5 - These defenses are similar in many ways. Both live off their reputation from a few seasons ago. In reality, while both have decent to excellent pass rush capability their run stopping has been spotty at best. With Westbrook, the Eagles have the decided advantage over Cedric Benson and will exploit it all day. Play action will make Donovan dangerous and the Eagles will role. The only way this one goes the Bear's way is if they kick it to Hester. That said, please do since I want to see it.
SEATTLE -9.5 over St. Louis - Seattle should run these guys out of the building. Shaun Alexander and Steven Jackson have been statistical equivalents for much of the year. Problem is Steven stopped playing games in week 3. Is it time to call Alexander over the hill as an NFL RB? I certainly think so. Watch him slip big time next year in fantasy drafts.
DALLAS over Minnesota +9.5 - I will follow conventional wisdom here and say that the Cowboys and going to take care of Adrian Peterson at home. The Lions did it, how hard could it be???? Big day for Romo and the boys through the air (obviously) as they approach this one with a chip on their shoulder after last week. The goal from this point forward has to be a rematch with the Patriots the last game of the year. TO starts his run here with a monster game.
JACKSONVILLE over Indianapolis -3 - My bet is Jacksonville springs the upset. This one should have some fireworks for sure. Without a consistent run game (due to the Jag D front) and with a gimpy Marvin Harrison, Peyton will make some mistakes and give this one away in the 4th. MJD will do his best Barry Sanders impression with 130 and 2.
Busted Stud of the week: Peyton Manning - Peyton runs into a D designed to stop his team on the road. The result is a sub-par game (for Peyton).
Sneaky Play of the week: Bobby Engram - Filling Branch's flanker role, Engram should light up a suspect St. Louis defensive backfield.
Fantasy Report: Xbody vs. Davecat - Xbody got did get the best of me in our week 5 match up 92.65 - 78.73. Notable players for him that week included Ben Watson (18+ pts) who I traded him the week before and the Houston kicker Kris Brown (23 pts) who he randomly picked up to fill in a Shayne Graham bye week. To me, that screams "born with a horseshoe up his ass" luck, the kind of luck he is unlikely to experience again. He and I are 2nd and 3rd overall in the league respectively behind the "genius" who happened to draft this year's LT, Tom "3 TDs a game" Brady (and Ashley Lelie....um, yeah). I actually lead Xbody in overall points 542 to 537. With no more regular season match ups, I'll have to dispose of him in the playoffs (if he makes it). Watch out for Randy Moss hamstring injuries. Being one year older than Randy, I can attest to the wear and tear age wreaks on your body. It will be that much sweeter when the Brady - Moss connection is derailed and Braylon propels me past his nosediving squad.
Go Lions & Go Blue and Go Kate's Section
Friday, October 19, 2007
Week 7 Picks
After a nice 8-3-2 week, I'm ready to keep things rolling. Let's get right to it.
HOUSTON +1.5 over Tennessee. Vince Young abused Houston, his hometown, last year. This year, and this week in particular, will be different, as VY is nursing a quad injury. He'll lose his elusiveness, and if he plays, his arm doesn't scare me in the least. Tennessee's run defense has been great, ranked number 1 in the league, but I like Houston's defense to do most of the damage in this AFC South battle.
DETROIT -3 over Tampa Bay. Rod Marinelli has his former employer coming to town. Coming off their bye week, I've got to believe the Lions will be ready. While Jeff Garcia and Joey Galloway will connect for some solid gains, I think Jon Kitna and his group will be ready to do more damage. The Lions also get Kevin Jones back in the lineup as a starter.
New England -16.5 over MIAMI. Miami always gives the Patriots trouble, especially at home, but I just can't see it going down this year. The Pats just have too much going for them, and the Dolphins can't beat anyone. Bill Belichick will key on Ronnie Brown, and with the Chris Chambers trade going down, the Fins are without their only receiving threat. Stick with the Pats until they lose.
NEW ORLEANS -9 over Atlanta. Brees and Bush finally got it together last week, and they did it in a place that's not easy to win in, Qwest Field. I was all about the Seahawks, but New Orleans made some defensive plays early, and Bush looked like his old, versatile self. Coming home this week, they'll keep things rolling against a horrible Atlanta team that gives Byron Leftwich a shot. I like Norwood to finally take control of that backfield, and I believe he's got another home run in him this weekend.
NEW YORK -9 over San Francisco. The Giants are hot right now. Eli is playing well, as is their defense. San Francisco is looking just one morsel better than the Dolphins. All Giants are looking solid for fantasy.
Baltimore -3 over BUFFALO. The dolla' dolla' Bills y'all ain't nothing. Ray Ray and the rest of the defense will dominate.
WASHINGTON -8.5 over Arizona. Washington is catching Arizona without their Dynamic Duo at quarterback. Not that they would have dominated the 'Skins secondary, but their chances would have been better than Tim Rattay's. Washington at home should utilize Portis, Betts and Cooley, and maybe even Santana Moss.
Kansas City +2.5 over OAKLAND. Larry Johnson to get 35 carries and control the clock, while KC's underrated defense shuts down Daunte's Inferno.
CINCINNATI -6.5 over NY JETS. The Bengals have got to get it right at some point, don't they? What happened to the team that looked so great on Week 1, with the defense blitzing and making plays, forcing fumbles, etc.? Carson gets off this weekend. Chad will get back on track.
Chicago +5.5 over Philadelphia. Philly wasn't so impressive last week against the Jets that they should be giving five and the hook to the defending NFC Champs.
SEATTLE -9.5 over St. Louis. The Rams aren't going to be the Rams until Action Jackson is back. Seattle's offense should control the clock with Shaun, and the scoreboard at home this week (unlike they did last week).
Minnesota +9.5 over DALLAS. The Vikings are so one dimensional that it might actually make them two dimensional. Or something like that. Dallas is going to have to throw everybody in the box to stop All Day Peterson, and their secondary (Roy Williams) isn't good enough to shut down anybody. I like Dallas at home, the Vikings are obviously not the Pats, but this is just too much spread for me.
Pittsburgh -3.5 over DENVER. Denver hasn't stopped the run all year, they just don't have the personnel for it. Fast Willie will dominate this game, and the Blitzburgh D will be all over Cutler, who is without Javon Walker for another two weeks. I don't see Hines Ward and Co. making much noise against the Denver secondary, but if Fast Willie has a big first quarter, a Pittsburgh receiver will score on a play action pass in the second.
Indianapolis -3 over JACKSONVILLE. This should be a great Monday night game, let's get that out there. Jacksonville has found their running game, MoJo and Fred looked great last weekend. Their run defense is also top notch. And the Colts are the Colts. Everyone, save David Garrard, is worth starting this week. I need Reggie Wayne to catch two for fantasy reasons, so I'm a Colts fan this week.
Thursday, October 18, 2007
The REAL Champions
Davecat is a homer to the Lions, I'm a homer to the Maroons.
Sign the petition.
Sign the petition.
A petition to the NFL owners demanding the return of the Pottsville Maroons’ 1925 championship is now online, according to David Fleming, the ESPN senior writer behind it.
“E-mail it to your friends, put it in blogs, put it up on message boards, let this thing take off in cyberspace,” said Fleming, the author of the petition and “Breaker Boys: The NFL’s Greatest Team and the Stolen 1925 Championship.”
When Ian H. Lipton, a member of Lasting Legacy of Pottsville, heard the news Monday evening, he told his son, Eric S., to log on to the computer at their Nathan’s furniture store in Hazleton.
“We want to be the first ones, Eric and I ... Eric, are you doing that now?” Ian asked.
“Yes,” said Eric.
And Ian became the first to sign his name to it at 5:50 p.m.
Fleming said people can link to it by logging onto the ESPN Web site and clicking on “Page 2,” where Fleming’s weekly columns can be found.
After signing hundreds of copies of his book for Maroons fans in Pottsville during the three-day “Maroons Week” celebration Oct. 10-13, sponsored by Lasting Legacy, Fleming announced ESPN would launch this petition in an attempt to help the team get its National Football League championship back.
While Fleming said Friday “ESPN is going to be sponsoring an online petition,” on Monday he said ESPN is only allowing him to create this forum.
“That’s one of the things I wasn’t clear on that I should be clear about. ESPN is not — quote/unqoute — hosting it or sort of sponsoring it. Obviously, they support me and the support the book. It’s an ESPN book,” Fleming said.
“If ESPN didn’t approve of it, they wouldn’t allow it on the site. But it’s not that ESPN is explicitly endorsing it,” said Michael Solomon, New York City, ESPN Books executive editor and editor of “Breaker Boys.”
ESPN provided a forum for it, much the way a newspaper allows opinions to be printed, or Fleming’s columns on ESPN’s Page 2, Solomon said Monday.
“It’s really part of Dave’s column,” Solomon said.
ESPN’s Web site receives 18 million users per month, according to Amy Phillips, the site’s director of communications, New York City. And Fleming’s columns receive 500,000 hits per week, Solomon said.
Over the weekend Fleming said he scripted the petition and had it approved by ESPN.
It’s titled “The Pottsville Maroons 1925 NFL Championship Petition to NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, NFL owners, NFL media,” according to Petition Online.
Its first paragraph states:
“We, the undersigned, ask the NFL to proclaim the Pottsville Maroons the 1925 NFL champion; to restore the legacy of one of the most dominant, influential and important teams in NFL history; and to consider several members of the team, including Maroons running back Tony Latone, for enshrinement in the Pro Football Hall of Fame.”
Eventually, the list will be sent to the NFL. When asked who will be delivering it, Fleming said “It will either be me or someone from Pottsville. Or it could be someone from ESPN Books.”
The last time the City of Pottsville attempted to get the 1925 championship back was in 2003. Gov. Ed Rendell and a legion of supporters across the county, state and nation rallied to the cause. But, on Oct. 30, 2003, the NFL owners voted 30-2 not to reconsider the case.
Ian Lipton said this petition has given the city “a renewed hope.”
“At this particular point, it gives us a renewed hope that given enough participation on the part of the public and given enough exposure by the by book, we have the opportunity to go back and ask the NFL to revisit the request,” Ian Lipton said.
The response “Breaker Boys” received in Pottsville encouraged Fleming to start the petition.
Lasting Legacy ordered 1,640 copies of the book since late September. On Monday morning, Ian Lipton said only 40 remained.
“There’s probably less than that by now,” Ian Lipton said Monday night.
Fleming said he intended to sign the inventory at Waldenbooks at Fairlane Village mall this afternoon.
“The people in Pottsville came out in extraordinary numbers for the book signings. If the people of Pottsville and the fans of the Maroons now come out and support the petition in the same record numbers, I think it would be fantastic,” Solomon said.
While Fleming is unsure when this petition will be taken before the NFL owners, Solomon suggested the best time would be at Super Bowl XLII at Cardinals Stadium in Glendale, Ariz., on Feb. 3.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Friday, October 12, 2007
The SportsGuy Does It Again
Regarding the Patriots and Cowboys, Bill Simmons summed it up perfectly:
Patriots (-5.5) over COWBOYS
For three reasons ...
1. The Pats are 5-0 against the league, 5-0 against the spread. Isn't Rule No. 1 of gambling to keep riding the hot team until it loses?
2. Tony Romo has started 16 games in the NFL. He looked great in five of them, good in three of them, mediocre in four of them, lousy in three of them and abysmal in two of them. Should I trust Romo in a gigantic game ... or should I trust Tom Brady, who has a 127.2 QB rating and three Super Bowl rings? You tell me.
3. When Dallas finally won Monday night's game, they showed Wade Phillips jumping around and the Sports Gal (reading a magazine) looked up, started giggling and asked, "Who's that guy?" When I responded that it was Dallas' coach, she laughed again and said, "That's their coach??? Really? It looks like he should be sitting at a sports bar stuffing his face with chicken wings." I'm supposed to take him against Belichick? Come on.
Week 6 Picks
Last week I was 7-7 in my Yahoo! Pick 'em League. Sorry for not sharing, but when you factor in 'juice', you would have been a loser anyways.
I am back, though, this week, and ready to rebound with some solid picks.
Like we always do about this time...
Tennessee +3 over TAMPA BAY. Normally, I'd take Tampa at home, but with their depleted backfield, I just can't justify it. The Titans' coach Jeff Fisher remains grossly underrated, and...AND...Vince Young just wins football games. I heard Fisher on ESPN 710 radio this morning in an interview with Colin Cowherd saying just that.
Minnesota +5 over CHICAGO. Minnesota will completely shut down Cedric Benson, and the Bears will limit Adrian Peterson and Chester Taylor. It'll be close, but I expect the Bears to do a little more in the passing game. Also, I just picked up Greg Olsen in my keeper league as a potential rookie keeper. I think he could be worth it since I couldn't get to Peterson or Marshawn Lynch.
JACKSONVILLE -6.5 over Houston. The Jags should dominate at home. They are great against the run, and Houston is still hurting without Andre Johnson to stretch the field. I expect Fred Taylor and MoJo to get back to their old ways of pounding the ball for 150+ yards.
CLEVELAND -4.5 over Miami. Cleveland is a surprise this year, and I like them to put up some points on the aging Miami defense. Ronnie Brown should have another great outing, as should Braylon Edwards, who is emerging as the best '3rd year' wideout in the league. Last week, I traded him to Davecat for Ben Watson and Ben Roethlisberger, who combined for three touchdowns in my victory over him. It just never gets old mentioning that.
BALTIMORE -9.5 over St. Louis. I don't think the Rams are going to get their first win on the road in Baltimore, and I can only hope that the Ravens 9 points last week against the 9ers will refocus Billick to get something going. I like "Thrill us" Willis McGahee to get it together and find some paydirt for once.
GREEN BAY -3 over Washington. Hey, 'Skins? Green Bay is going to throw the ball a lot on you. Like, 45 times a lot. Occasionally, once they've thrown it at least 10 times, they'll run a draw, but only after Favre fakes a quick hitch pass. No one else has been able to stop it, and you want be able to stop it in Lambeau either.
KANSAS CITY +3 over Cincinnati. I hate this game. But home dogs have been dominant this year and KC can keep that trend alive in Arrowhead. Larry Johnson should (finally) have his day, as everyone seems to light up the Bengals on the ground. Carson and Co. should also do just fine, so if you're really feeling lucky, take the over at 42.
Philadelphia -3 over NY JETS. Andy Reid is 8-0 after the bye week. That's good enough for me.
ARIZONA -4 over Carolina. The Carolina Panthers are opting not to start their rookie quarterback, Matt Moore, electing to sign and start 43 year old Vinny Testerverde instead. Vinny Testicles will blow this game. That's a guarantee.
SAN DIEGO -9.5 over Oakland. The Chargers finally resembled the Chargers last week, on the road, against Denver. The week before, they sucked it up at home against Chiefs. This is their 3rd divisional game in a row, and they need it. They're confident off their victory, and will handily take it to Raider Nation. (you like how I speculate on their confidence level, after a victory? Reality is they whole team probably hates AJ Smith for canning Marty, and hates Norv Turner even more for not being Marty. They're going to get crushed in the playoffs again, but this time it'll be in New England)
New England -5.5 over DALLAS. Obviously, the game of the week. Two 5-0 teams, one AFC, the other NFC. It's being hyped as the Super Bowl. Dallas is fortunate to have Terrance Newman back to cover Randy Moss. New England is fortunate to have years of coaches' signals and game tapes in some vault in a remote location that is the sole reason for all their victories since Bill Belichick became coach. Joking. Don't believe that for a minute. But the whole Cameragate/Spygate controversy is fueling the Pats. They want the Super Bowl so badly this year, just to spite all the recent naysayers. I was watching SportsCenter last night with my girlfriend, a Cowboys' fan (for some reason). In all the locker room interviews, she couldn't understand why all the Patriots were hyping up Tony Romo like he was Joe Montana. She didn't get why they were being so complimentary of him. I told her that that is just what the Patriots do. They mind-fuck you, then they pummel you. Also, I don't think it helps the Cowboys' cause for articles and rumors like this to come out. The Patriots could win by 35 and I wouldn't be surprised; all I know is that they'll win, and I promised myself not to pick against them until they lost. In addition to all those things, I just picked up an interesting tidbit for this game: Randy Moss, in 6 career games against Dallas, has 29 receptions for 675 yards and 10 touchdowns. And he's never once lost to the Cowboys...
SEATTLE -6.5 over New Orleans. The Saints are not the team they were last year. Without Deuce to carry the workload, Reggie Bush becomes less valuable. Drew Brees is not playing anywhere to the level he's capable, and I'm supposed to think the offense will sort it out in the raucous environment of Qwest Field? I don't think so.
ATLANTA +3.5 over NY Giants. I like the home dog on Monday Night. Buffalo covered, why can't the Falcons?
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Friday, October 5, 2007
Week 5 - WHEN THOSE SAINTS COME MARCHING IN
I'm headed off to the Big Easy early tomorrow to watch the Gators vs. Tigers CFB clash so this will be an abbreviated version of my picks. I'll be drinking and watching NFL on Bourbon street on Sunday so - um, go me! Maybe, I'll catch the Saints game, maybe I'll wake up face down in the gutter - either way I win:
Last week: 5-9
Season Record: 32-29
New Orleans (-3.5) over Carolina
KC (+2.5) over JAC
DET (+3.5) over WASH
ATL over TENN. (-8)
HOU (-5) over MIAMI
SEA (+6) over PITT
NE (-16) over CLE
ARIZ (-3.5) over STL
NYG (-3.5) over NYJ
INDY (-10) over TB
BALT. (-3.5) over SF
GB (-3.5) over CHI
DALL (-10.5) over BUF
Busted Stud of the week: Frank Gore (SF)
Sneaky play of the week: Ron Dayne (HOU)
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
From ESPN.COM - Trade like your life depends on it people.
Don't be shy: Trade!
by Christopher Harris
Enough pixel dust has been spilled over the psychology of the fantasy trade to choke a wood nymph. So today, let's talk about the psychology of the nontrade. If you are gun-shy, if the idea of dealing a fantasy stud makes your palms sweat, if your league mates refer to you alternately as "Pat Gillick" and "Oh Don't Bother E-mailing Him," this note's for you.
Trade. It's what you play for. Fantasy sports originated because a few very sun-deprived, very biceps-challenged individuals believed they could run a sports organization better than real-life general managers. "Shake things up!" they shouted over their agate box scores, Strat-O-Matic player cards and gazpacho. "Deal that bum! Call up that kid! And for god's sake, get rid of those Burger King uniforms!" (Note: that last cry was most typically heard among fans of the early-'80s San Diego Padres.) If you're going to invest emotionally in fake sports, you might as well be a fake Jack McKeon, right?
Fantasy football, in particular, begs for the wheeler to meet the dealer. We all act as though we absolutely know what to expect in August, we draft accordingly, and then LaDainian Tomlinson, Steven Jackson, Frank Gore and Larry Johnson proceed to play like Moe, Larry, Curly and Shemp for a month. Meanwhile, the top point-getters in ESPN.com leagues include Derek Anderson, LaMont Jordan and the Minnesota defense. Collectively, we are Schultz from "Hogan's Heroes": We know nuth-thing. And we rarely get it right the first time.
But trading affords us the opportunity to get it right the second, third or fourth time. While generally speaking, I advise against dealing players who are extremely undervalued, or buying players who've monumentally surprised, so many more deals in fantasy football wind up being good and fun and worth it, rather than scary or soul-killing. Package three guys to get a stallion. Trade your extra wide receiver for a long-shot running back. The season, like life, is short. As Magnapop once intoned: "Careful stays and careless dies. But careless is and careful tries."
The best part about this is fantasy football may be the one such game where one deal can absolutely transform your squad. I guarantee there are at least five NFL players languishing unused on fantasy rosters from sea to shining sea who will, in the next two months, wind up blowing off your league's doors, causing upsets, unsettling favorites, inducing sneers. Go find those guys. I wish I could tell you who they'll be (read my Friday column, The Breakdown, every week for my latest ideas), but the truth is: Opportunity and circumstance will dictate these studs-in-waiting, and it's awfully hard to predict either of those things. So err on the side of gluttony. Deal for several players, stock them away like so many unfermented Bordeaux, awaiting the kind of chemical reaction that produces sweet results.
Make offers. Make counteroffers. Accept offers. Deal a pleasant surprise at the height of his grandeur, and take on a former stud who'll romp again. Pry a superstar away with your depth. Confuse your loyalties with your horse-trading. Cause your league mates' eyes to roll with your audacity.
This is what fantasy sports are for. Say yes.
From the Message Board
THE MORNING AFTER PILL - WEEK 4
Here goes it….
Here goes it….
As much as it pain all of us, I have to start with Aaron and Team "It Was An Abortion Michael Like Our Fantasy Name Which Can't Get Any Longer But Maybe It Can…" Phenomenal win. Aaron was watching the Monday Night Game in Michael Irvin's living room at the Embassy Suites. He won the week when T.J Where'smyponytail caught Palmer's last pass of the game and got 100 yards on the nose. Aaron's reaction was like he just won an award at the Technical Emmys. "I haven't won a week since the Doping Agency! High-five bro!" he exclaimed. Up goes a Dubbs pic…..Frank the Tank takes the loss. I think next week Jed should start 4 or 5 Bears. Maybe pick up Kyle Orton or Desmond Clark at 4:20 am. Jed, we have to get the Bill Walsh Trophy out of your house. It's having a kryptonite like effect on you.
Let's give some love to Team Bumps. Hell, a standing ovation or maybe the wave. He put a stealth like hit on The Shocker. It was like the scene in Goodfellas when Morrie gets the screwdriver in the back of the neck. My sources in Diego tell me that amongst the dejection of all the Charger fans in the parking lot, Bumper was seen consoling a teary-eyed child in a wheelchair. He whispered to the kid, "it's okay sport, at least the Bloody Mary Mafia is back. I was down and out too. Just like you. But then I started Daunte and everything worked out. Keep your head up." And then he gave him his Hencho hat and did the "Culpepper Roll" for him. And then took his Hencho Hat back.
I'm at a loss for words with the Shocker. Don't give up Paul. I mean look at the Phillies, the 93' Bills, John Travolta, Ashlee Simpson. Comebacks really can happen.
How about Team Hemming! Grill Slappers dropped another "Ike Turner Uppercut" this week on 3 Foot Giant. It got so bad on Sunday afternoon that Mike had to wear a mouthpiece and he put a headgear on Julian to protect him from the punches. Vicious defeat. Mike pulled out all the stops. He even called the commish after a Jamal Lewis TD and told him that he meant to put him in that morning but his computer was down. Was there anything the commish could do? (True story) Aaron didn't even answer the question, but he did ask if he had any gigs coming up.
Early on it looked like Rusty Trombone was going to break a record we all thought would stand for eternity. Least Points Scored in a Single Game, 2005 – 14.5 Napoleon's Complex. (Side note: this Rockies/Padres game is amazing. Hey Paul, add the Rockies to that comeback list) Johnny Diamond should take Rusty T to Sizzler and thank him for that win. Diamond wins again with the Griese, Leinart, Gerrard shuffle. You could drink an entire bottle of Grey Goose with a King Cobra chaser and those QB's will still be a "3" when the bar closes.
Whiskey Dick was up big early. Dan Marino thought he was going to win the week. Then Mick looked at the logo and he was done. Guy unleashed the girl from the well and she bit Mick's head off. If you play Guy, tape a small piece of dark paper where his logo will be on your computer. It's your only chance.
You remember that scene in Mystic River that won Sean Penn the Oscar? He just found out his daughter was dead and it took an entire precinct to hold him back. Sunday – Greg – Chargers. But Team Motorboat is firing on all cylinders. Like a 67' Margaux, or the 60' Aston Martin Zagato or even the 72' Dolphins. Could this be the first team in history to go undefeated? Greg should enter this team in the $100,000 Fantasy Challenge in Vegas. Or maybe Greg should just take Irvin to Sizzler because that team is "a bum asking for change in the middle of an intersection". Sign says: Taking it in every hole – real hard. Will work for a Wide Receiver.
(Cue theme song from Hoosiers)
All I got is this blog men. My team is doo-doo. Michael Irvin is a one-hit wonder, a flash in the pan. I am the Faster Pussycat, the Faith No More, the Jimmy Eat World of our league. But I will never stop fighting, never stop battling. I will watch every game, I will scrap the bottom of every waiver wire looking for kickers, I will offer outlandish trades, I will change my logo every week, I will live on the block, I will post ridiculous polls, I will tell people at parties that our league is the best league, because fantasy makes reality easier men! Hollywood Packers! Grrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
Draft Do-Over
This has been a crazy year for sure. If you followed conventional fantasy wisdom and drafted one of the big 4 (LT, Gore, LJ, S. Jackson) with your top four pick you might very well be looking at a 0-4 record going into week 5. You are correct to panic but don't feel alone. Here are 2007's top 5 at the key positions to date using standard Yahoo scoring:
RB
1. Ronnie Brown
2. Joseph Addai
3. Marion Barber III
4. Brian Westbrook
5. LT
Comments: Look for these numbers to even out by the midway point of the season with LT and LJ filtering back up to the top of the RB ranks. S. Jackson bust year will continue in a big way.
WR
1. Randy Moss
2. Plaxico Burress
3. Housh
4. Chad Johnson
5. Steve Smith
Through one quarter of the NFL schedule, the receivers have proven to be more consistent in many cases then the top RBs that went rounds earlier. The name guys that everyone expected to perform have done their jobs. Look for Randy Moss to continue his insane season. Currently on a pace to catch 28 TDs, Randy is this year's LT (circa 2006) caliber stud.
QB
1. Tony Romo
2. Tom Brady
3. Carson Palmer
4. Peyton Manning
5. Brett Favre
I have Tony Romo on three of my four teams and I'd like to say I predicted this kind of success, but that would be a lie. Tom Brady and the Patriots will continue to get all the press since he wins Super Bowls and has sex with super models but Tony Romo came out of nowhere to lead his Cowboys to an undefeated first quarter of the season. This list of players further demonstrates why it is never a good idea to use an early pick on a QB. Obviously you are doing fine with Peyton on your squad but you overpaid for him and missed out on a good RB or WR. Worst case, you nabbed Drew Brees early. All I can say is hopefully the waiver wire is kind to you.
Defense: (in a league where kick return TDs count)
1. Minnesota
2. Chicago
3. Detroit
4. Pittsburgh
5. New England
These lists will change significantly between now the end of the season but you should just realize there was no way you could of foreseen these ridiculous results from the early NFL season. With a few savvy trades, some waiver wire vigilance and a strong stomach you can claw your way back. Just keep after it.
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Week 4 - Almost the quarter-way point
Last week: 8-8
Season Record: 27-20
MINNESOTA over Green Bay (-1.5). Minny's D is the best fantasy D in the league bar none. Greenbay and Brett Favre like to start fast but usually flame out. I'm not predicting GB's demise yet, I just don't think this is their week. The Minny fill-in QB will be a passing improvement over Tavaris Jackson and A. Peterson will run wild. He is the next great running back in the game.
Start: Peterson, Minny D / Sit Favre, Any GB running back
Houston over ATLANTA (+3) Joey will nail a few more nails into his career coffin with a sub-par outing against a surprisingly good Houston D. As a Lion's fan I feel comfortable guaranteeing a sub-par outing after a decent outing last week.
Start: Dayne, Roddy White / Sit: Joey
New York Jets over BUFFALO (+3.5). Buffalo will trot out a rookie in Trent Edwards. Look for T. Jones to carry the load in a slug fest between wretched teams.
Start: T. Jones, L. Coles, M. Lynch / Sit: Lee Evans
Baltimore (-4) over CLEVELAND. For all the progress and life the Browns have shown on offense with their outburst vs. Cincy and the emergence of Braylon and Soldier their defense will ultimatly be their undoing. Jamal will not get revenge this day as the Baltimore front will shut him down. Braylon will get behind Corey Ivy and company at least once for a long touchdown.
Start: Mcgahee, Mason, Braylon / Sit: J. Lewis
DALLAS (-13) over St. Louis. The only thing that will get in Romo's way will be the fact this Ram's D is so leaky on the ground their be no need to pass. That said, I think TO will still come out of this one with over 100 yards and a TD.
Start: TO, Barber/ Sit: Bulger
DETROIT (+3) over Chicago. The Bear's D is hurting but the Lion's is as well and they don't have all the injuries to use as an excuse. Last week's defensive lapses at Philly are all the more disheartening for the Lion's faithful because the cover-2 is supposed to be a D that limits the "Explosive Play" (i.e. plays from scrimmage whether they be via pass or run that amount to a 20 or more yard gain) by keeping everything "in front of the D". Both the Vikings and the Eagles went max-protect and ran 2 man patterns where their speed receivers ran right by the Lion's deep safteys. I see no reason Berrian will not do the same. The Lion's O will have a softer matchup than most expect but they will have to avoid falling behind by a lot since this group (as injured as they are) are disciplined and well coached.
Start: Griese, Berrian, Kevin Jones, Roy Williams, Jon Kitna / Sit:Bear's DST, Cedric Benson
MIAMI (-4) over Oakland. Lamont Jordan is living up to all the hype he has.....last year. He may be a season last but owners should expect him to continue his torrid rushing pace this week against a Miami D that hasn't been that special. The Oakland D was billed as a great pass D last year but they've shown themselves to be vulnerable. Watch for Chris Chambers to do his normal damage and help Miami pull this one out.
Start: Chambers, Ronnie Brown, Jordan / Sit: Ronald Curry, Culpepper
SAN FRANCISCO over Seattle (-2). Seattle doesn't stop the run particularly well and Gore is all SF has in its arsenal. They are going to saddle him up and ride him to victory.
Start: Hasselbeck, Gore, Branch / Sit: Alexander
Tampa Bay (+3) over CAROLINA. Outside of Minny, TB is my surprise fantasy defense. Most "experts" branded them too old but Brian Kelly and Ronde Barber has been able to hold it down on the outside in the Tampa-2 while Cato June, rookie DE Gaines Adams and 10,000 year vet Derrick Brooks are keeping other team's run games at bay. Carolina has David Carr throwing to S. Smith which is akin to putting Corolla tires on your Ferrari (sorry X-body).
Start: Tampa DST, Carnell Williams, Joey Galloway, D. Forster / Sit: D. Williams
ARIZONA (+6) over Pittsburgh . The move to play Warner probably came as a bit of a surprise to Baltimore last week. Obviously Pitt has a week to prepare for that change. What they will not be ready for is the Arizona heat. Veteran QB play, ultra-talented wide receivers and the hot Arizona sun at 1pm in the afternoon will combine to force the upset of the week. Look for Edge to be shut down for the most part and Card's safety Adrian Wilson to neutralize Fast Willie by becoming a permanent fixture down in the box.
Start: Boldin, Fitz, S. Holmes / Sit: Edge, Leinart
SAN DIEGO (-11.5) over Kansas City . This game will come down to who has the better passing attack as both side's once dominant run games have sputtered. Bank on the talented Charger's skill position players to make the passing game go.
Start: LT, Gates, Rivers / Sit: LJ, Huard, Bowe
Denver over INDIANAPOLIS (-9.5) . Denver touts their pass D as unbeatable and opponents usually head the warning and stick to the ground game. Ranked 27th in rush D as of last week, Denver's almost inviting teams to take that course of action. Peyton Manning and the boys are one of the few teams that will seldom let the defense dictate their style of offensive play. This week the Bronco's superior secondary play will dictate the Colts take a more measured offensive approach centered on the running of Joseph Addai and underneath routes to Anthony Gonzalez and Dallas Clark. If the Colt's rookie left tackle is out with an ankle injury, a close game could turn into a major upset. Brandon Marshall will further assert himself as one of the better young WRs in the league. Think a mix between Larry Fitzgerald and A. Boldin. Grab him now if you are in a keeper league.
Start: Dallas Clark, Addai, Brandon Marshall / Sit: Harrison, Wayne
Philadelphia (-3) over NY GIANTS. I like Westbrook to repeat his performance from last week.
Start: Westbrook, McNabb, Ward Sit: Curtis
New England (-7) over Cincinnati. Does anyone in the world thing the Bengals have a shot? I sure don't. If NE has any kind of weakness (is said IF), it has to be in the secondary without Harrison in. We know NE will jump all over a poor Cincy D causing Carson and the boys to pass to catch up. He will get sacked all day long. It will get ugly. I promise.
Start: Moss, Brady, Maroney, Housh Sit: Carson, Cincy DST (duh!)
Busted Stud of the week: Peyton Manning- In years past the Colts have picked on the corner back opposite Champ Bailey with great results. This year look for Bailey to match-up on Wayne and Dre Bly to match up on Harrison. Manning will not be shut out but he will be forced to rely on Addai and the underneath routes to move the ball. The Colts can still be productive since the Bronco pass rush is sub-par but Manning's numbers will suffer.
Sneaky play of the week: Dallas Clark - Peyton will find someone open and Dre and Champ can't cover everyone.
Week 4 Picks (Weak 3 Results)
You're just going to have to trust me that I went 5-8-3 last week in my Yahoo! Pick 'em league against the spread.
On to Week 4.
Green Bay (-1.5) over MINNESOTA. Both teams have solid defenses, but I like Brett Favre and company to make a few more plays in this one.
ATLANTA (+3) over Houston. Andre Johnson and Ahman Green are out, so this seems like the best chance Atlanta is going to get to win a game.
BUFFALO (+3.5) over New York Jets. Two of the 'other' teams in the AFC East square off in Buffalo. Why not take the home team, who is getting points? Probably because their QB is out and their defense has been horrible, but what the hell!
Baltimore (-4) over CLEVELAND. Just too much Baltimore defense in this one.
DALLAS (-13) over St. Louis. I'm a firm believer in never taking a team giving this many points, but St. Louis looks horrible this year, especially without Orlando Pace, and now Steven Jackson. They've got no defense whatsoever, Romo and the 'Boys should put it to them.
DETROIT (+3) over Chicago. The Bears are a little banged up on defense and Brian Griese is about to start his first game since leaving Michigan. Not really, but this guy must be rusty, he's been dropped by three teams for chrissakes. I like Marz to spread it out and air it out; I'm taking the points at home.
MIAMI (-4) over Oakland. Ronnie Brown finally came alive last week, and I think he can continue some of that productivity this week at home. And with any luck, the 'Phins fans won't greet Daunte Culpepper too cordially.
Seattle (-2) over SAN FRANCISCO. San Francisco can't throw the ball. Like, at all. They're nearly as bad Kansas City.
Tampa Bay (+3) over CAROLINA. The Panthers are without their starting QB. That's my reasoning. I bet this game is a push anyways.
ARIZONA (+6) over Pittsburgh. Six points seems like a lot to me for a team that just it took Baltimore's defense on the road. I like Edge and the dynamic duo at receiver to have solid outings and cover this hefty spread at home.
SAN DIEGO (-11.5) over Kansas City. Two road losses in a row has the whole league wondering what's up with the Chargers. Even LT has come out and said he's not happy, and that something must be done. I'll be at this game on Sunday, and I expect the Chargers' fans will be showing their 'Bolt Pride' to the fullest.
INDIANAPOLIS (-9.5) over Denver. Indy always seems to make Denver look just straight up silly in the RCA Dome. Plus, Denver is two last second field goals away from being 0-3. They're overrated. San Diego will still win that division.
Philadelphia (-3) over NY GIANTS. As long as Westbrook is able to play, the Eagles should take this one with superior defense.
New England (-7) over Cincinnati. I've got to see the Pats lose before I bet against them.
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
From the Message Board
I thought we should start a new segment called 'From the Message Board'. This one's pretty simple: we're going to take the best posts from our Fantasy League Message Boards and throw them up for your entertainment.
TOO BIG FOR YOUR BRITCHES....
Dear Bumbling Irishman,
Morning Nurse Harty. Pretty high after that victory, huh? You’re like the guy who dances like a fool when he hits the house, and I’m the guy that’s been there so many times that I just keep chugging along. Go ‘head and gloat though. I know it won’t happen often for you. The sun shines on your ass for once, and you go and get all mouthy. Typical. Does the #1 team in the league really need your Start ‘Em and Sit ‘Em Class? I don’t think so. We don’t take the advice of LOSERS.
I don’t need to hear from you who should be in my starting lineup. I hear directly from my players. I just got off the phone with Warrick Dunn. He expressed his disappointment in me. I could do nothing but apologize to the man. But I let him know a few things so he could understand where I was coming from regarding my decision to bench him. #1. He had only one TD this year, a 90 yard jaunt. #2. In his last 38 red zone appearances, he hadn’t scored once. Not once. #3. Blittsburgh’s defense is always strong against the run, giving up only 3 rushing TD’s all year. #4. Buffalo’s D has given up twice as many rushing TD’s, and gives up, on average, 40 more yards a game. Hence, Maroney got the nod.
Now, I don’t think I need to tell you that I can’t start 5 RB’s. You may think I’m getting away with that based on not only my record, but the points I’m putting up per game. It’s not the case though, Nurse. I can only start 3 myself. Barlow and Mo Jones-Drew are going to put up some points from time to time. More power to ‘em. They want in the lineup. There’s still a chance for them. We’ll see. You like that Dallas Clark waiver wire pickup? Little page out of your own book, huh Nursey-poo? What about Denver’s DST? You like that? Grabbed them off their bye week and they’ve gone for 16, 16 and 17 points in the last 3 games.
Oh, and despite your criticism, I won ANOTHER FUCKING GAME, and I am STILL tops in the league. Larry Johnson a fantasy bust? Are you fucking serious? You are the biggest joke in the league, and I think you’ve gotten a little big for your britches….
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
10 Questions from the Weekend
10. Are the Green Bay Packers for real? Brett Favre just led a comeback against the Chargers, and tied Dan Marino's record for most touchdown passes, at 420. Looks like he's still got something left in the tank.
9. Is there a better NFL environment than Lambeau Field? A homage to Bill Simmons, originator of the 'Running Diary'.
8. Honestly, what did Roger Goodell think he was going to find with the Patriots' tapes?
7. Who are second and third, respectively, in rushing yards for the NFL right now? Lamont Jordan and Jamal Lewis. Who would have guessed...
6. Can he keep up this pace? Big talker Chad Johnson is averaging 147.33 receiving yards per game thus far. Projected over the entire season, that would be 2,357 yards.
5. Can he? Randy Moss, averaging 134.33, would top out at 2,149.33 yards.
4. Do you remember when I said that Rex Grossman should be benched? Well it's about that time...
3. After Sunday night, is there any doubt that Dallas is the team to beat in the NFC? And is there anyone that can beat the Patriots in the AFC (remember, they're playing without Richard Seymour or Rodney Harrison)?
2. From NFC Championship to an 0-3 start. Can the New Orleans Saints salvage their season without workhorse Deuce McAllister? Even with Deuce, what's wrong with Drew Brees?
1. Did you see the Family Guy Star Wars tribute? Instant classic.
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Lion's seek first 3-0 start since 1980 / Teams going for 3-0
Contender or pretender?
After two weeks of the NFL season, there are 10 teams that have 2-0 records and seven of those teams failed to make the playoffs last season. Here's a look at those seven teams and the opponents they'll face as they try to establish a 3-0 start:
- Detroit -- at Philadelphia (0-2)
- Green Bay -- San Diego (1-1)
- Denver -- Jacksonville (1-1)
- Houston -- Indianapolis (2-0)
- Washington -- N.Y. Giants (0-2)
- Pittsburgh -- San Francisco (2-0)
- San Francisco -- at Pittsburgh (2-0)
Week 3 - Mulligan
Last week was both brutal and embarrassing from a football prognostication standpoint. I have no excuses for you. We just have to get better as a blog. We know our loyal readers expect more from us and we intend to deliver.
Week Two record - 8-8 Overall Record
Winners (ATS) in red
Indy @ Hou (-6)
Start: Peyton, D. Clark, Addai / Sit:Ahman Green
SD (-5) @ GB
This should be all about LT. If they get him going it is all over. If he continues to struggle watch out for a resurgent GB defense to force Rivers into some mistakes. My guess is LT goes for over 100 and 2 TDs.
Start: LT, Gates, Chargers DST/ Sit: Farve
Minny @ KC (-3)
This should be the most boring game of the year. Both teams want to rely on the run with shaky QB play and both teams will. The key difference is Viking run D which will shut LJ down and make the KC offense "no-dimensional". All that said, I am going with the home team to pull this one out some how, some way.
Start: A. Peterson / Sit: LJ
Detroit @ Philly (-6)
The game of the week as far as I am concerned. I expect both teams to put points up. If D-nabb doesn't he better get on the bus with the
Start: Roy Williams, Donvan, Calvin Johnson / Sit: Detroit DST, Eagles DST
Buff @ NE (-16)
Everyone is expecting a route and the Patriots will not disappoint. I expect the usual suspects to do damage against a bad Bill's defense. It is doubtful that NE will approach this game with the same energy they marshaled against SD and CHI. Consequently, Buffalo will score a few points against the vaunted NE D making this a bit closer than people expect.
Start: Lee Evans, Moss, Tom Brady, Maroney / Sit: JP Losman
Miami @ NYJ (-3)
The Jets will welcome the Fin's with open arms after facing
Start: Laverneous Coles, Thomas Jones, C. Chambers / Sit: Ronnie Brown (always)
SF @ PITT (-9)
The SF offense is broken and
Start: Willie Parker, Heath Miller/ Sit: Gore
Zona @ Balt. (-8)
Matt Leinart has a lot to learn and Ed Reed and Ray Lewis will be willing teachers this week. The run game of the Cardinals will do nothing and Leinart will give the ball up multiple times.
Start: All Cardinal O Players / Sit: Baltimore DST
St. Louis @ TB (-4)
St. Louis misses Orlando Pace more then then they are willing to admit. They are also missing starting guard Ritchie Incognito and the result will be a poor offensive output for a third straight week.
Start:
Jac @ Den (-3)
The one thing we do know is that
Start: MJD, T. Henry / Sit: Cutler, Gerrard
Cincy @
After last week's putrid defensive showing against the Browns, Cincy looks to rebound out west.
Start: All O players / Sit: both DSTs
CLE @ OAK (-3)
This is not last year's
Start: Braylon, R. Curry, L. Jordan / Sit: J. Lewis
Car (-4) @ Atl
Should Joey get to keep his locker or does he have to give that to Byron as well. Bye Bye Joey!!
Start: S. Smith, J. Delomme / Sit:
NYG @
Jason Campbell is on his way to becoming a respectable starting QB in the NFL. He will shred this defensive secondary just like Romo and Farvre did the first 2 weeks of the year.
Start: S. Moss, C. Cooley, Portis, Buress, D. Ward / Sit: Shockey, A. Randle El
Dallas @ CHI (-3)
This one is all about Romo. Facing a tough D in their home stadium is never easy and people will start to believe in him if he is able to pull a W out of his hat in this one.
Start: TO, Berrian / Sit: Rex
NO rebounds with a big offensive effort at home on Monday night.
Start: Colston, Bush, Brees, C. Brown / Sit: Mcallister
Sneaky Play of the week: Nate Burleson (SEA WR) He will take advantage of DJ Hackett's absence and the poor Cincy pass coverage.
Busted stud of the week: Vince Young (TENN QB) The most vulnerable part of the NO D is deep pass coverage, that is not Vince's strong suit. He will have trouble playing catchup with Drew Brees and the boys once they get going in prime time.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
10 Q's from the Weekend
Only 10 Q's, yes. And on Friday. It's been a busy week.
1. Should I just stop picking against the spread? I just went 4-11-1 (although the underdogs went 12-3-1). Had I bet all these games, I'd be a broke man. Thankfully, I didn't, but I did come out a winner in my 'straight up' pick 'em league. SO much easier when you negate the spread...
2. Does anyone else hate Tony Bennett? As far as I'm concerned, there was Sinatra, and then there was everyone else. And now 'everyone else' is dead. You're up, Tony. I just spent your entire Emmy performance wearing earplugs and looking for confirmation that X-tina is pregnant.
3. Do the Patriots even need to cheat? That was a message. And it was clearly delivered: 'we don't need cameras to beat the 'sexy', overrated Super Bowl pick.' They CRUSHED San Diego. It really just makes the Chargers look terrible. They had an entire offseason to build up rage for the playoff loss. ALL the pressure and media attention was on New England with the 'Cameragate' incident, and they still annihilated them. Norv Turner can't make this team better.
4. Derek Anderson?
5. Who scored the most points in my keeper league, Ashley's New Teeth? Yours truly. My lineup was Carson Palmer, Larry Johnson, Rudi Johnson, Edgerrin James, Javon Walker, TJ Houshmanzadeh, Jason Witten, Neil Rackers and New England DST. (on the bench: Deion Branch, Joey Galloway, Braylon Edwards, Santonio Holmes, Laurence Maroney, Kolby Smith, Tony Hunt) God my team is sick.
6. Things have officially turned sour for Donovan McNabb. Can he accomplish what the Philadelphia fans want and deserve?
7. No, seriously, Derek freakin' Anderson??
8. Is skipping an awards ceremony when you're nominated ever worth it? Just ask Ricky Gervais.
9. What has happened to the New Orleans Saints?
10. Who told you Randy Moss was going to stud out this year? Yeah, I thought so.
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Week 2 Picks (This week's theme, It's only cheating if they catch you)
"I think this guy just stole my wallet!" Eric Mangini - Head Coach, NY Jets
(winners ATS in red)
Week One record - 11-4-1
Buffalo @ Pittsburgh (-9)
No huddle spread attack - check, lighting fast running back - check, QB fresh off a 4 td game - check, best DB and linebacker that should be stopping the aforementioned offensive players in new NFL cities as a result of free agency - check. Nate Clements and Takeo Spikes probably wouldn't make that much of a difference. The Steelers will win easily but the Bills will score some points in the 4th to make it look closer then it really was. Lee Evans will be thrilled Champ Bailey is back in Denver and that the Steeler corners can't stay with him. (I guess X-body was right about something for once). Big Ben will come back down to earth with a good not great game since they will not need the pass to take the Bills out.
Start: Willie Parker, Lee Evans, Marshawn Lynch / Sit: Buffalo DST
Cincinnati (-7) @ Cleveland
The worst QB in the league against an opportunistic defense playing catchup with a team possessing one of the top three offenses in the league. Yeah, this one will be over quicker than Ed Hochuli can dead lift a metric ton. Keep in mind the Bengals scored 30-plus in both meetings a year ago and have won five straight in the series. 
Start: Carson, Chad, TJ, Cincy DST, The Soldier / Sit: Everyone else who thinks some drunken, shirtless fat factory worker with a bone around his neck barking at you is actually cheering for you
Indy (-7) @ Tenn
Indy has gone down in their last 3 road games against division opponents and last week Tenn demonstrated a style of play you can expect from them all year by carving up a very good run defense in Jacksonville in route to an upset victory. Tenn will play Vince ball which is ball control, run-centric play calling punctuated by opportunistic defense. None of this will help your fantasy squad but it does win games in the real world. Jeff Fisher is a genius. I bet he cheats. I also wonder if this former Colt's cb (Nick Harper) will fare better than Jason David did last week for the Colts. I think he will.
Start: Chris Brown, Marvin Harrison / Sit: Vince Young
Houston @ Carolina (-6.5)
Carolina will roll in this match up. Steve Smith will make someone miss on a quick hitch and take it to the house opening the flood gates. I generally like Schuab but he will look more like Joey Harrington than Joey Montana against tight corner coverage. Julius Peppers is the best defensive end in the league and he will wreak havoc like you would expect once the Panthers silence the Houston run game and make the Texans one dimensional.
Start: Steve Smith, Delomme / Sit: A. Johnson and M. Schuab
SF @ STL (-3)
Gore's mother just died this week so his head may not be in the game (assuming he plays as planned) but it probably will not matter. Assuming they are all in the building, Alex Smith, D-Jack, Click-Clack and Gore will shred the hapless Ram D. Nate Clements and my sleeper D of the year who stymied the Cardinal's great receivers will blanket the gimpy Torry Holt and frustrate Bulger into mediocre numbers. Steven Jackson will get a face mask full of Patrick Willis all afternoon as the rookie makes things rough for everyone's favorite former Beaver. Pace (who is out for the year) is not irreplaceable but he will be missed. (late breaking news) T. Hill the Ram's starting CB will also miss the game with a back injury further depleting an already weak St. Louis D.
Start: Gore, Vernon Davis, D - Jack / Sit: Holt, Bulger
GB @ NYG (-1)
The old gunslinger has a few bullets left in the gun. The same secondary that made life easy for Tony Romo last week will bend to the will of the man with the funny last name. Favre will feature Driver all over the field including the end zone and Jennings will take a short pass to the house assuming he is healthy. D. Ward will run 'cause that's all they got. Greenbay's under rated D will feast on the Hefty Lefty if he starts in place of an injured Eli. My hunch is he will and all the talk of Eli suiting up and playing is just gamesmanship by the Giants. If GB is going to contend for the division this is a game they have to win against a depleted NFC foe.
Start: Favre, Driver, D. Ward / Sit: Plaxico, Shockey
Atlanta @ Jacksonville (-10)
I freely admit I harbor a Ford Field sized grudge against Joey Harrington. He will go down and go down hard this week but not before the Jag's D can redeem themselves by taking at least one of his passes the other way for 6. You have to assume Jacksonville will commit themselves to re-establishing the run. Look for MJD to have his first of many good performances this year in a Jacksonville route.
Start: MJD, Fred Taylor, Jag's DST / Sit: all the dirty birds
NO (-4) @ TB
Everyone assumed the Saint's offense would pick up where they left off last year. This is the week where it happens. Galloway might try to do his best Reggie Wayne impersonation but with the Caddy in the shop, Sean Peyton's offense will carry the day.
Start: Colston, Brees, Galloway / Sit: Garcia, Buc's DST
MINN @ DET (-3)
Detroit is facing one of the stonger run Ds in the league. Good thing the Lions don't concern themselves with little things like running the football. Minny will double Roy "THE TOY" Williams all over the field and probably try to single cover 6'5" monster Calvin "Megatron" Johnson with 5'9" Antoine Winfield. Expect the Vikings to blitz the Lions heavily and pay a price for doing it as that is exactly what the Greatest Show on Turf Redux wants the defense to do. Also, with TJ out this week you might see a glimpse of the Lion's future starter at RB, Kevin Jones to prepare him to play significant snaps next week in his hometown, Philly or in two weeks against division arch-rival Chicago. He has reportedly looked great in practice all week. Adrian Peterson will continue his strong running with over 100 yards and 2 TDs but Tavaris Jackson will have a rough time of it playing catch-up all day long.
Start: Kitna, Calvin, Detroit DST (yeah I said it) / Sit: Tatum Bell, Tavaris Jackson
Dallas (-4) @ Miami
Tony Romo will continue his hot play against a depleted Miami secondary with 300/3. Miami doesn't have the talent at the skill positions to take advantage of the shoddy Dallas secondary that Eli and Plaxico torched for 3 TDs last week.
Start: Romo, TO, P. Crayton / Sit: Ronnie Brown
Seattle (-3) @ Arizona
The Cardinals will slow Alexander like they did Gore last week. Watch for Leinart to rebound with a big game to one of his two stud WRs off play action. Also, look for Edge to continue his strong running with over 100 yards.
Start: Edge, Leinart, Fitz / Sit: Hasselback, Seattle DST
NYJ @ Balt. (-10)
In the battle of backup QBs, the team with the best defense will win. Kellen will make it closer then you would expect and the Jet's D will be happy to play someone in an honest game picking Boller more than once.
Start: Balt. DST, Jericho, Todd Heap / Sit: Both QBs
Oakland (-10) @ Denver
Travis Henry and Lamont Jordan will both be featured running and catching the football as these two bitter division rivals play a closer game then people expect. Culpepper will buy time with his legs and keep drives alive with dump downs to Lamont and timely passing to Jerry Porter (or whoever the guy Champ is not covering is). T. Henry will be effective on the perimeter and between the tackles all day long.
Start: Lamont Jordan, T. Henry / Sit: Jay Cutler, Javon Walker
KC @ Chicago (-12)
This one has blood bath written all over it. A team that struggled to put 3 points up on Houston last week will turn the ball over and fall behind quickly. Look for Grossman, Benson and Berrian to be featured all day. They will feed Larry Johnson early but the score will dictate a shift to the passing game by the second quarter. Look for at least one Bear's DST score.
Start: All Bears / Sit: All Chiefs including Larry Johnson
SD @ NE (-3.5)
Everyone will be talking about Belichick and his cheating but the real story in this one will be revenge for last year's playoff loss. Brady and Co. can try to max protect like they did against the Jets but the SD pass rush will get to the QB just like he did in last's year's playoff match up. The Pats will miss their safety Rodney Harrison against the Charger's run game more then they expect. Watch LT go over 100 and score twice. The Charger D will shut down the Patriot run game and make them one-dimensional just like they did against the Bear's last week. Randy, Tom, you guys might want to shorten up those patterns this week. Also, Mr. Watson will be targeted short more as a result of the defensive pressure.
Start: LT, Gates, SD DST, Ben Watson / Sit: Maroney
Washington @ Philly (-7)
Philly will rebound on Monday night at home in a big way looking much better then they did on the road against the Packers last week. Mc-nasty will connect at least once with Curtis on the same long pass play which he just missed last week. Philly has been vulnerable on the ground in years past so look for Washington to try to establish the one-two RB punch early and often. Clinton Portis will take a bigger share of the carries in the offense this week and with one of the top Philly DBs (Lito Shepard) out, look for Santana Moss to get lose for one of his patented long TDs. Cooley's numbers will suffer until the team gets the RT spot squared away after losing John Jansen for the year to a dislocated ankle as he will be asked to expand his blocking role at the expense of his pass catching. The Skins will keep the game tight but eventually fall short.
Start: Curtis, Westbrook, Portis, Moss / Sit: Cooley
Sneaky Play of the week: Patrick Crayton @ MIA - filling in for Terry Glen, Partick Crayton will help Romo pick on the depleted Miami secondary
Busted stud of the week: Tom Brady vs. SD - Please don't hurt him Shawne, he's got a few new mouths to feed.
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